Once for my birthday, my sister made me a card that I have kept in a shoebox under my bed to this day. The card was made of folded pieces of paper that somehow formed a small, thin, rectangular box. She had decorated the box to look like a camera, and when I removed the lid, a strip of pictures unfolded, almost like a xylophone, staying connected-by glue, perhaps, to the top of the lid and to the bottom of the box. The pictures were of my sister and me, and they captured everything from my favorite memories to moments I still can’t quite remember. On the back of the small box, my sister wrote me a lovely note that made me smile ear to ear and even brought tears to my eyes. I recall that she had also gifted me some more material items: a new lip gloss, a book I had been dying to get my hands on, and a sweatshirt that I still wear frequently. Despite the material gifts she gave me, what I cherished the most was the little camera made out of construction paper with glue stains across the front of it. You may think that I was just really fond of birthday cards, but what really stuck with me was the idea that my sister had spent her time making something for me.
A few weeks ago, one of my coworkers asked me a strange question. I was organizing a display near the back of the store where I work when he approached me and asked: “Laila, why do girls like receiving flowers?”
I opened my mouth to answer him before realizing that I didn’t know myself. I had never thought about why I enjoyed receiving flowers; I just did. As I continued with my work that day, I considered the answer to this question. I thought about that camera birthday card I had received a few years ago and realized that the feeling of receiving flowers is quite similar to that of being given a handwritten card. Since then, I have been deeply pondering why little things like flowers or birthday cards can have such a massive emotional impact on the recipient.
The answer I’ve come up with is simple: thought.
It is easy to look at your friend’s birthday wish list and simply click purchase on an online item. It’s a somewhat mindless task. Making a card on the other hand or picking out a bouquet of flowers that remind you of them both require you to take time and really think about the person you are giving to. Oftentimes as a society we spend too much of our time obsessing over material items when it comes to giving gifts and forget that sometimes what the recipient may really value most is the thought.
The shoebox under my bed is full of some of my most valued possessions that have been given to me by other people. Coincidentally, none of them have any monetary value. I keep ancient birthday cards, heartfelt get-well-soon letters, fragile dried flowers, sentimental grad cards, concert tickets and memorabilia from various events I have attended. The conversation I had a few weeks ago with my coworker helped me to realize that it’s the things that make it into the shoebox that matter most and that will be remembered longest. I urge you to consider sentimental value next time you are wrapping a gift for your friend. I would encourage you to spend time writing your loved ones cards instead of purchasing items from your Amazon cart. Buy the flowers, write the card, make the playlist, and give an experience. Do the smaller things even if they are slightly less convenient because, in the end, it’s the little things that matter most.
